Things I’ve learned – By Phil Hall
There is a saying that you should learn something new every day. I have always tried to do that but, recently I’ve started to notice that older stuff that I’ve learned has fallen out somewhere along the way. I have been told that our memories retain the most important things and archive the things of lesser importance so that is probably the reason why so many of the things that I remember concern motorcycling. It is a constant frustration to me, and a source of amazement to others, that I fail to remember the name of a person to whom I have been recently introduced but can, with equal ease, tell you who won the Harvie Wiltshire Memorial Trophy in 1976.
I should add that, given the relative lack of historical records of our motorcycling (the wonderful historians, Don Cox and Jim Scaysbrook are doing their best to redress the balance) it is probably a good thing that there are many others like me who retain memories of aspects of motorcycling otherwise our precious two wheeled history could be in danger of being lost entirely.
While there are some who decry social media and its “dumbing down” of our communication skills (I am one of these people), the fact is that it has had a very beneficial effect in helping to preserve our motorcycling history. Facebook is filled with pages and groups dedicated to sharing information about our motorcycling past and there are many dedicated web sites focussing on various aspects of Australia’s motorcycling history. Finding them is always an issue and determining the accuracy of the information contained in them is also problematical, but, as a digital “oral history” they often stand as the ONLY history available of aspects of Australian motorcycling.
Having said all that, I want to take a journey through some of the things that I have learned about motorcycling over 40 or so years. I am certain that you will recognise many of them and quietly nod your head in agreement as you read. In no particular order and in a totally random fashion, here are some of the things that I have learned. Some will require a degree of explanation but most won’t.
The first time you take an opportunity to ride up the driveway and out onto the street without your helmet will be the one time that a police car drives past your house.
When doing a repair, the most critically important part that you require to complete the job will be the one part that is on long-term backorder. The corollary of the above is that, when the part finally DOES arrive, it will have the correct part number as the one it is due to replace and for which you have waited for months, BUT IT WON’T FIT.
That tiny nut that you are trying to do up after putting your fairing together will fall into the fairing at the last moment and will, eventually, cause you to have to remove the whole fairing in order to find it because it is a “special” nut and you don’t have any others.
The one day that you decide to duck down to the shops without your wet weather gear under the seat will be the day that you get caught in a sudden hailstorm.
When touring you will always find that one of the things you will DEFINITELY need is sitting at home on the bench in the garage. AND you will find it out at the end of the first day of the trip when you are 600kms from home.
In connection with this, please bear with me when I give you a sad, from-life example. We were doing an Oxley ride. Walcha was the overnight destination on Day 1. About one nanosecond after I clicked the disk lock on the front wheel, I realised that the key for it was hanging on the key rack in the kitchen at home. Stupid? For sure. To this day, whenever I stay at that hotel someone will remind me of it and laugh.
The day that you decide to sell your limited edition bike will be the day that you find three others of them listed, at least one of them being better value than the one you are trying to sell.
One every group ride, there will ALWAYS be at least one rider who is faster than you (the same applies to every track day you attend)
When your bike starts to fall as the sidestand starts to sink into the mud on the side of the road you have two choices. Let it fall gently into the mud without damage or tear the ligaments in your wrist trying to save it.
Your bike will never look as good as it does the day before you have to ride it to work and it rains all the way. The corollary to this is that you will never get better performance and better fuel consumption from your bike than the day before some major mechanical fault manifests itself.
The shortest distance between two points is peppered with road works.
The one day that you get “that” corner perfectly nailed will be the one day that your mate cried off on the ride and you left your GoPro at home.
There is never an overpass under which to shelter when you get caught out riding in the rain.
The eternal dilemma of the rider if it starts to rain while you are riding. Do you.
- Ride on and hope that the rain eases off while knowing that you are getting progressively wetter? or
- Stop and put your wet weather gear on while standing in the rain, getting wetter while you do so?
Hoping that that “marginal” rear tyre will last you till you get home.
The nagging doubt about the accuracy of the service station’s air pressure gauge.
You’ve just done your research and bought your next bike and your mate says, “Geez, mate, I wish you’d have checked with me, that model has a major gearbox issue.”
If it doesn’t feel “right” it probably isn’t, for reasons that may or may not become apparent further down the track. I have deferred/delayed riding in situations like this and, every time, something has happened that proved the wisdom of the decision. The corollary is when you feel really uneasy on a very familiar piece of road. It may never become clear why that was so, but, take the warning, back it off a bit and be safe.
“That” noise that you hear from somewhere. You’ve never heard it before and you’re just about to set out on a 3 day ride.
Ride your own pace. So many accidents happen on group rides when it gets competitive and you look at the bloke in front of you and think, “If he can do that, so can I.”
Two hours between stops is not just a random figure that the authorities have plucked out of the air to use in road safety commercials. UNLESS you are an iron butt rider who is accustomed to riding prodigious mileage each day, plan to stop every two hours (roughly) whether you think you need to or not (VTR1000 and KTM SuperDuke riders have no choice in this matter). For many of us, this limit is imposed by our bike’s tankage, but, even if you can ride 375kms on a tank (I can), stop every two hours anyway. Your mind and your body need it even if you don’t think they do.
Advisory Speed Signs are just that, advisory, and their accuracy is questionable at best. Often they are alarmist and you find you can go much faster through the corner than they suggest. Sometimes they are laissez faire and you can find yourself faced with a corner that is much tighter than you are expecting. On an unfamiliar piece of road, treat them as being accurate just to be safe. Once you get to know the road yourself, you should have your own built-in advisory. There are two particular corners on the Putty Road that illustrate this principle perfectly. Heading south, the first right hander is advised at 55km/h but it is actually quite innocuous. The next right hander (straight after it) is posted at 65km/h and turns out to be a much sharper and slower corner. Both can be taken at considerably higher speed (the posted limit at that point is 80km/h) but the illustration of the unreliability of advisory signs is there for all to see.
Riding “Tail End Charlie” on a group ride is tedious!
If you are going to park your bike on its sidestand and facing downhill, put it into first gear and make sure it is engaged before walking away.
The two great bike shows you want to see will both be on on the same day.
When you are watching the bike races, NEVER say to your mate, “Watch out for #47, he’s a GREAT rider.”
When contemplating a purchase, do your research. The internet is crammed with such useful info. Don’t join a forum dedicated to that model, however. All are run by and populated with aficionados who can sometimes “gloss over” known faults with the model you are planning to buy. Once you HAVE bought, then joining a forum for that model is a good move, for a multitude of reasons.
Don’t buy a bike that is too small for you. In these days of LAMS restrictions it is not quite so critical but never make the mistake of thinking “A 500 will be big enough for me.” It won’t be.
There are many others that I could include but that will do. Hopefully my list has been both helpful and entertaining.
